When we were kids, my mom had a habit of asking us a question at the end of each day… “what new thing did you learn today?”
No…. It wasn’t an academic question.
The answer could be something as simple as, “I came to know about a bus route” or something more important like, “chewing gum has an affinity to hair” .
And so we were advised to review the day just before we hit the pillow at night….. What went right, what went wrong and especially what could have been avoided….
And the day ended with a heaven bound telegraph that read “Thank you Lord….for today and for the hope for a new sunrise” followed by sweet dreams.
So I kind of developed a habit of sitting still with a blank look on my face before bedtime.
For the first few days after our wedding, it used to bother dear husband a lot as he assumed that, may be, he has upset me in some way and that is why his otherwise talkative wife is silent.
Sarcastic Jokes About Spouse – Funny Or Insulting
We are returning from a dinner party…..
Most of us were young couples.
We ate, played some board games, had a good dinner etc.
One husband was constantly making jokes about his wife and her parents. The new bride was obviously upset yet scared to open her mouth. She was making an effort to smile while holding back tears.
And there was another wife who was loudly talking about why she chose to marry her husband and her husband was obviously uneasy about it.
And many joined this fun and started listing out the compromises they made in their marriage. Of course they also said,”just kidding” after every joke.
I believe sarcastic comments are made to mask pent-up anger. No amount of, “I was just kidding” is going to take that sting away. Hurtful words once uttered can only be forgiven but not forgotten.
We were the ride back home for one couple. Needless to say, on the way back, the husband did not even look at her face nor did he allow a single word to escape out of his mouth while she sat next to him in the back of our car happily blabbering about the party, the food, the people etc etc.
May be I lack sense of humor or may be I am old fashioned. But is it wise humiliate your own spouse like this just to get a few seconds of laughter from friends?
Friends are just friends and spouse is the one with whom we are going to spend the rest of our life.
I almost had to bite my lips to stop it from speaking my mind when a girl said that she does not find her husband ‘manly’ when he tries to focus by sitting at the edge of the seat while driving. He does not drive casually like the men who ride bikes in advertisements…… (he wears thick glasses). Honey, they are professionals covered in almost armor like apparel and they drive on a closed course unlike your hubby who drives in bumper to bumper traffic among irate rash drivers.
I wanted to ask, “would you rather be in an accident at 80 miles per hour?”.
He retaliated with an insult.
I cannot believe that she assumed that her husband would take it as a joke since he laughed at jokes aimed at other men. Duh…..
When facing a “real problem”, I definitely understand the need to vent out or get advice from friends & family or anonymously in relationship forums provided one is smart enough to cover oneself properly with a cloak of anonymity.
But what is the necessity to hurt your spouse just to provide some entertainment at a party?
They both came as a happy couple but left as an unhappy one.
At the end of the day, they have to say bye to their friends and go home with one another.
Similarly, when the husband was insulting her family, I am sure his new bride was thinking of how her daddy toiled all his life to educate her and get her married to ‘this’ man.
Only after my friend pointed it out to me, I noticed that I rarely join the “girls group” in a party and that I tend to stick around my husband and other ‘coed’ groups ( I am not clingy. I swear).
She lamented that given a chance she would dash way from her husband’s presence. She is not at fault as her husband considers insulting her in public funny. I felt very sorry for my friend when she said “I avoid him when others are around. Because even though he is a very good man, he gets carried away and he hurts me”.
Me: “Well doesn’t he know that he still has to go home with you at the end of the day and that you still have the rolling pin readily accessible right on the kitchen counter top”. 😉
She: “today I will teach him that lesson”. 🙂
Me: ….. It is about time ….. 😈
Dh overheard us and turned toward me and gave me a look that said, “stop ….my little trouble maker”…… 🙄
Her husband has a choice…. He can take my mom’s advice and think about his day and about the things he could have avoided before hitting the pillow or get hit by the rolling pin….. That would make the entire day flash before his eyes in an instant.
(sorry… Rolling pin is mentioned just for joke. DO NOT ATTEMPT SUCH STUNTS AT HOME)
Here is an idea for a peaceful night’s sleep –
Insulting your spouse in public is injurious for your health 🙂
Okay, here comes the disclaimer:
1. Generalization police: : No… I am not generalizing. Most couples avoid washing dirty laundry in public. (This is about the handful who do).
2. Humor police: No.. I am not saying we shouldn’t joke about our loved ones. lack of humor in a party will make it a ‘lemonade party’ filled with sour ‘lime juice’ people. So joke away. Make sure your spouse finds it funny too…
3. Gender police: All points are gender neutral. Both men and women are guilty of this.
4. Freedom of expression police: perfectly okay to vent in an online forum. So is getting guidance from trust worthy friends and family members. Do not suffer in silence. Ask for help. Insulting spouse before a huge group is not asking for help.
5. Domestic Violence police: I was only joking about the rolling pin I swear.
(Not meant to hurt anyone)